This is for people who like to see their beds covered with mountains of pillows.

So how exactly is one supposed to sleep on such a bed? Tell me, tell me – there must be a secret. Am I supposed to somehow contort my body around all these in a way as as to not upset the arrangement of the pillows? Or maybe the bed is for looking rather than sleeping, and I should just sleep on the floor/carpet?

Also, what is the solution to “the twenty pillows on a couch” problem? Apparently, we are not supposed to put them pillows aside to make room for our behinds, nor God forbid sit on/against them. Are we supposed to stand instead, and admire the couch since it “apparently” looks nice with all the pillows?

Say – aren’t beds meant for us humans to sleep on, and couches for us to park our behinds upon? Or have the rules changed? When did pillows get higher preference over a tired body – particularly one that may have partly/wholly financed the bed, couch and the pillows?